Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Letting Go When the Cramp is so Deep

There are times in my life, when the whimsical grace of God beckons me to loosen my grip on the things of this earth that are of little eternal gain or loss. God simply knows I would walk or run with greater haste and fleet footedness; should I cast them out of my hand. He’s a good and wise Father who really does know what’s best for His kids, but is gracious enough to let us try and walk or run with full hands, so as to move into self-discovery only to realize; He was right.

Then there are other times in my life when His grace is less whimsical; and often forceful in command to hold on and not let go. Despite the fact that all human strength seems to wane at times like this; His grace takes its grip over mine and assists me in holding onto handle and hilt so as to not falter in the battle or aim of my swing. Ultimately to be found standing back to back with a lone comrade of the heart; watching as the mist clears only to realize the enemy’s defeat and we the sole survivors. Sword locked so tightly in hand that one’s fingers must be pried from their place. To God be the glory the battle was the Lords! For that, a tight grip is essential, yet impossible without His covering.

Then still there are deeper things that only His grace can touch; despite my initial insensitivities to His workings, until it’s too late to reject His Fatherly discipline. These are the times I most struggle. Letting Go When the Cramp is so Deep and so locked onto its object of affection; and often for the most pure and initial grasping’s. I mean really, does not the Bible tell us to “hold onto the good”? I’m sure it does. But as we’ve all heard, good can often be the enemy of the best.

It is in those times that I scream in pain as the Master therapeutically, by His grace alone, breaths rest and release into that cramping grip that I once thought so noble. That grip that once gleamed brightly to reflect fidelity to a covenant or promise of good intentions; now unwittingly stands between the freedom and bondage He died so richly to provide.

Oh you may not fully understand the permanence or struggle of a cramp so deep on a noble grasp that only the Divine can loosen its lock, but let me tell you we all have them. We all have our Isaac or Benjamin or aspiration or aim once thought of Divine origin, yet only to realize they’ve become Nehushtan. Nothing more than idols born from the provision of God at a time of great vulnerability and ignorance, yet still supplied at one time by His grace. Funny; how He sets things up to test our love and devotion. He is indeed wise in that way.

So what must we do when the grace of God comes and pierces the deepest of grips? If Letting Go When the Cramp is so Deep causes such labor and anguish, we must know in our hearts that His infinite wisdom and mercy is at work once again; freeing us. Yes freeing us from shackles of bondage we have imposed. Shackles not from the hand of an oppressor outside, but from the oppressor called self and desire.

For the moment my wants and desires, goals and ambitions, covenants and commissions, overtake my allegiance and grasp on Him alone; I can be rest assured He will swoop in by His grace and fight my death grip that has cramped so deeply only He can break its hold.

Letting Go When the Cramp is so Deep is impossible for me alone; but with His grace and infusion of rest and release I can become free. All the while not knowing I was bound.


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