Pain & Fear

Stay tuned for some thoughts on Fear versus Pain. How can they exist in the life of a believer? Where do they fit if at all?

Sooner or later, everyone will hear and everyone will speak. Why not make it elective and initiate. He will reciprocate.

Early On

“Early on, I made the mistake of wanting spiritual feelings to endure and remain romantic. Like a new couple expecting to always feel in love, I operated my faith thinking God and I were going to walk around smelling flowers. When this didn’t happen, I became confused.
What was more frustrating than the loss of exhilaration was the return of my struggles with sin. I had become a Christian, so why did I still struggle with lust, greed, and envy? Why did I want to get drunk at parties or cheat on tests?” (Donald Miller, Blue Like Jazz, p.66.)

If I didn’t know better… I’da thought I was quoting myself. And in a way I am. Many of us have gone through what Miller is describing. That sense of “early on feelings” of goodness, grace, love and hope. Yet all too often they fad like early morning fog in Mystic Iowa.

When the “good feelings” fog faded in my life, the lie I begin to believe was that something was wrong with me. When you start to think something is wrong with you… the fleshy response of self-preservation begins to kick in… and you get ticked off at the rest of the world… because you’re sure THEY are causing you to feel bad... even God.

Can you believe that, we actually get mad at God… thinking that in the mix of all we’re feeling it’s somehow His fault. Or it’s the fault of our spouse, or our pastor, or the church, or the schools, or the government, or the liberal pagans that are infiltrating our precious religious culture, or the Taliban or Al Qaida, or Al Gore, or Bill O’Reily, or Jimmy Swaggart, or Jimmy Hendrix, or Bill Marr, or our diet, or our lack of opportunity or privilege. Oh how wrong we are.

As I see it NOW. The “early on feelings” of goodness, grace, love and hope are real. But they are real, because they are relative to the centrality and proximity of God’s voice. Jesus speaking our name, Jesus calling us out of darkness into light… no condemnation, but only acceptance and remedy for the moment and eternity, that’s what we hear. It is that Voice that most often comes when the PAIN we are experiencing becomes so deafening that all other sounds and voices are silenced. You know… the kind of pain that is so loud that everything in our existence hits zero degrees Kelvin… it’s that colder than ice type of pain… where we hear the Voice of Love – the Voice of Life.

As we realize the truth that a single solitary Voice called us from our tombs of death, pain and bondage… life, peace and joy become more and more of a reality. The “trick” that the enemy of our souls wants us to accept is that… the hearing of that Voice is a one time thing for all the rest of our lives. But that is the most treacherous lie we could ever embrace. That “trick” keeps religion in power. That “trick” keeps wounds from healing. That “trick” keeps the masses living in the shadow lands… somewhere between dark and light… between victory and defeat. Pain.

When we accept the facts and the truth that comprise the Love of God – we cannot but help understand that He wants to hang out with us 24/7 and He wants to talk to us and wants us to talk to Him. What do you think happened in the Garden? Do you think Adam and Even dressed up and went to church on Sunday and Wednesday nights? And God put on His best suit and “preached” at them for 45 minutes and then they went back to their tree house for fruit and nuts? I don’t think so. They walked and talked with Him. They sat and shared their thoughts and hearts. They laughed and embraced. They communed with each other. They listened to each other. They experienced the good feeling of RELATIONSHIP... until they (Adam, Eve and we) believed a lie… until that lie brought pain. At that point Adam and Eve took evasive fleshy actions that led them into sin… into darkness and deafness… ultimately into death.

Lies always and eventually bring pain. Then we start to feel the need to cheat, drink, envy, covet, and lust. Can you see the reversal that occurs? God desires that “early on good feelings” continue, but those feelings are absolutely contingent upon our willingness to ONCE AGAIN and regularly HEAR THE VOICE OF LOVE.

Stop right now and think about your “early on” experiences with THE VOICE OF LOVE. Would you like to get back to those “early on feelings” of goodness, grace, love and hope? You can.

Call… email… comment… blog… scream… cry out… pound down another shot… do whatever you feel you need to do… but DO NOT REMAIN SILENT, because He’s not! Stop. Listen. You will hear His Voice.

One thing I know for certain… my life and my mission are to facilitate a connection between you and Jesus. Is that your phone ringing? Maybe it’s God?

A Few Thoughts

Just a few things. 1) I've been away from the net for a while, because I took a week off to clear my head and heart... kinda like an Internet fast. 2) I really loved my anonymous friend's comment posted regarding belief in God or the lack thereof. It was pretty thoughtful and will take some time for me to think through and respond to, but it was still a good response. 3) My friend's post has gotten me thinking about apologetics and the necessity thereof... I'm not sure if I'm supposed to engage in a "debate" about God, but maybe more of a discussion of what I believe God (if there is a God - and I do believe there is) has done in my life. I'm kinda jazzed in a way, because the folly of the cross always stirs up discussion amongst people who have deep thoughts and tender hearts. 4) I'm not gonna post much more tonight simply because I'm tired and don't seem to have the time for deep and free thinking and writing these days. That will change soon I'm sure.

So for now... I'll stop. I'm waiting for the offer to have coffee with my friend.

Why Should I Pray?

I was thinkin' about a pure and healthy motivation to pray. Let see... should I pray because I wanna appease God? Should I pray because if I don't who will? Should I pray because the Bible tells me I should? Should I pray because it's my religious duty? Should I pray because the AG declared that their churches should participate in a week of prayer? Should I pray because it's the only thing that moves the Hand of God? Should I pray because I'm so full of sin that if I don't I'm damned? Should I pray because I need something? Should I pray because others pray?

Well here's a shocker. I'd say initially none of the above. Oh I can find validation for some of the above, but what I'm looking for is the purest and most healthy motivation or reason to pray. Here it is.

Because I wanna! That's right, because I want to. Let me explain my rationale.

If I pray for any other reason (many of which I listed above are valid reasons to pray) other than because I want to... it's possible I'm being dishonest with myself and God. Think of it this way. Does God want us to obey Him because He says so, or because we simply want to obey Him? Do you understand? Wanting to obey... wanting to do right... and then doing it, is far more genuine than doing anything by compulsion or under duress.

So in short... I think I'll pray because I want to... not because I should. Think about that the next time you woefully head off to the next prayer meeting or the next time you think you should be praying instead of blogging or Facebooking or playing some inane video game or watching the latest episode of The Office.

Later!

Just Tired of Being a Nazi

I really wonder how many clergy take into consideration the day to day weariness that sets upon the lives of working people? I say that because, when I was a full time clergyman, versus a bi-vocational clergyman, I used to be like a Nazi when it came to guilting people into doing church stuff and getting involved.

Now don't get me wrong... I love the Church and I love Jesus, but since I started working in the trade business (carpentry, painting, remodeling) I come home each night... WAY MORE EXHAUSTED than I ever did when I did pastoral work full time.

I know being a full time pastor is hard work. I was a biology major during most of my undergraduate days, so I understand the physiology of a working brain and know that it has the highest metabolic rate of any organ in the body. Working the brain, which is the seat of our soul, does indeed tire a person out, but MAN... by the end of the day, these days I'm shot. Sometimes after dinner, I'm too tired to take a shower. I just crash.

I really wish I could go back 20 years, knowing what I know and having the ease and confidence in Christ and myself, and do the ministry differently. I'd be way less of a Nazi in my demands of the lay people of my perish. As it is, I expect no more from my congregation than I am able to give. So I think I'm a healthier more well rounded clergyman than I ever was 20 years ago.

To my anonymous comment friend: If I were you and had your convictions and beliefs, I sure wouldn't worry about who knew or my identity. I would just say "to hell with all of you... I can think and feel what I want". But then, I can't do that because I'm a clergyman. I can only say "hell" in the context of a sermon on eternal damnation.

I'd love to have a stiff cup of Kenyan AA Mission Dark Roast coffee with you sometime. If you're ever in the neighborhood, email me at radrev7@yahoo.com.

Someday Church Only Memory?

During the Wednesday night Youth Group gathering at our house, discussion arose about what the church means to people. The students discussed the many friends they knew who claimed to "go to church" but lived and displayed very contrary behavior.

First let me say that I'm blessed with a hand full of kids that for the most part really understand that the "church thing" we all tend to do, has little if anything to do with their relationship with Jesus and being a Christian.

As that thought swirled around the group, we began to ask the question: What if the church became illegal or non-existent as we've historically known it?

Now we weren't talkin' about the dismembering of the Body of Christ here on earth, but the organization, the buildings and locations that far too many think have significance or bearing on if they are "Christian" or not.

By the end of the discussion, the students determined that the possible elimination of the organized group, buildings and land, typically known as church, may indeed become a reality and a good thing at that. A good thing because, to the hungry Child of God, hypocrisy is a bane to their desire to follow Christ and make a difference.

The students said that because so many kids claim Christianity and church, yet so few genuinely live it, their testimony for Christ's work in them, holiness, determination and faith, all seem to fall on deaf ears.

Maybe that's how it's supposed to be in the end. Those who desire to follow Christ, WILL suffer persecution. I know the mild persecution that our students may experience, is NOTHING compared to the millions who are dying for the sake of the Gospel. But, everyday, their lives are tested, just not to the point of death.

I really believe their desire for DISTINCTION of faith and followership in Christ, is okay because it WILL force them to line up on one side or the other. If anything their struggles to follow Christ in this day and age are simply a sad reflection on a nation that had ALL the opportunity to possess and administrate the power and mystery of Christ, yet we have failed our Mission here at home.

Yes... we've failed. So to the student's I would say... live strong NOW for Christ, for the day and the hour will come soon, when their faith WILL be tested to an even greater degree. And to the ones who ENDURE to the end, they will receive the Crown of Righteousness.

So, when our church buildings and our organized religion disappear... we will find out who belongs to Who.

Is Gaza Another Sign?

I watch news. Sometimes too much. Most stuff on TV is hard to watch because it goes contrary to where my heart needs to be, so I avoid most of what's broadcast. But these days, watching the news does something for me. It's not scary or unsettling as one might think. Just the opposite.

As I watch things unfold in Gaza, the Ukraine, Wall Street, Detroit and any number of other places that merit a sound bite report all I can think of is... Jesus you must be coming soon? I know, people have been thinking that for 2000 years, but eventually some generation will see that day.

I wonder how many church folk are keepin' their ear to the ground and their eyes to the sky? Since we've been around this eschatological mountain many times before, for some, they don't think twice. But for others, like myself, I'm thinkin' I might not even get my next sermon done before the Trumpet sounds.

I could be wrong, that's nothing new, but think for a minute... Some generation, some day, some minute will be the ones to see it all unfold. My money's on this generation.

May God protect the innocent people of Gaza and may we know and understand the Power of His Grace and Mercy in these our last days.